- Trip Tom Hiddleston, he apologizes for having clumsy feet.
- Shove Tom Hiddleston, he apologizes for getting in your way.
- Punch Tom Hiddleston, he apologizes for cutting your fist with his cheekbones.
- Lick Tom Hiddleston, he apologizes for tasting weird.
- Bite Tom Hiddleston, he apologizes for bleeding in your mouth.
- Fuck Tom Hiddleston, he apologizes for getting you pregnant.
- Kill Tom Hiddleston, he apologizes for sending you to jail and not inviting you to his funeral.

